silent all these years

The last few days I’ve received a lot of messages from people applauding what they call my bravery and my willingness to put myself out there. The truth is I wasn’t always like this.

Growing up I had secrets. Lots and lots of them. I had all kinds of feelings that I couldn’t express. They weighed me down. They took over my life. They threatened to ruin me.

When I got to college in 97, I decided to give them up. I started telling my secrets to anyone who cared to hear them. I learned that other people had secrets too. I learned to let go of the shame. I told people how I felt about things, and for the first time in my life I felt free.

And so today, at 36, I’m pretty much an open book. I don’t hold onto secrets. I don’t bottle up my feelings. I don’t feel shame about being me.

I’m free.

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