the kids: a progress report

  • Jackson and Freya start school this week. It’s weird to think that summer is almost over.
  • Freya and I have really been bonding this last week. We went to the mall (just the two of us) yesterday and she told me it was “so much fun!” and then tonight she asked, “So should I call you Jenn now?” I know it seems silly, but I’ve been waiting for what feels like forever for her to feel close enough to me to call me Jenn. We started at Miss Jennifer >> Jennifer >> and now Jenn. Somewhere in there I was referred to as “her” quite a bit. We had a rough patch about a couple of years ago.
  • Everything I have read about divorce and kids and blended families indicates that at first the kids see a new person as a threat to their parents ever getting back together and it’s only after accepting that the reconciliation will never happen that they are actually able to accept a new parental figure.
  • It has been interesting to see how both kids have reacted to having a more traditionally structured family life. I can tell that both of them like having the other “parent” around. For example, Jackson’s behavior has improved drastically since having a male authority figure around. There have been so many times over the last four years that I have struggled with getting him to obey me the way he instantly obeys his father. He has quickly fallen into that pattern with Dave, as he clearly sees him as the alpha male and instantly obeys him. It’s sort of crazy to see.
  • On the other hand, Freya clearly enjoys having another female around. She seeks me out to cuddle, read with her, watch shows with her, do her hair, etc.
  • When we took them to the new house over the weekend, they were both super excited. They both told us that it’s the “best house ever.”
  • Freya is no longer afraid of Violet and laughs when she hisses at her. This is huge progress.
  • Overall: things are going quite well.
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