I went to the dentist today because the left side of my face (ear, jaw, and teeth) hurts. I can barely open my mouth on certain days. After x-rays and an exam, the dentist declared that I really do just have the worst sinus infection ever. Apparently my sinus cavity is quite low and butts up against the nerves in my teeth.

Fuuuuuuuck me.

So I’m back on antibiotics and steroids. Oh joy. I was actually hoping I needed a root canal. How fucked is that?

I’ve been lying around all day like a lazy piece of shit, but at some point this evening I need to rally and finish up the Christmas shopping. Because Christmas is this weekend…like how did that happen? Wasn’t it just October?

In other news, I found out this week that my ex is telling our child to keep secrets from me; one of which is that D isn’t Jackson’s boss and so Jackson doesn’t have to listen to him. I’m going to fuck my ex way the fuck up, but I’m going to wait to do it until after Christmas. I don’t have time for his bullshit right now, and Jackson and I have talked it out extensively. We seem to be on the same page.

I get that the ex is still all butt hurt or whatever over the divorce, but he needs to get a fucking grip. He’s acting like an angst-y teen when he is actually a 37 year old father. He needs to get his shit together and stop putting our kid in the middle of things. Jackson was like, “I hate being in the middle of this. I feel guilty and like I’m disappointing my dad because I care about Dave.”

I’m going to have to cut a bitch clearly.

Another thing Jackson said that broke my heart is that he very much wants D and I to be married, but that he’s scared we will break up and he will lose his family again. *sigh* I reassured him that he doesn’t need to be worried about that (for multiple reasons) but he’s an anxious little boy and I hurt for him. I love him so much. His happiness means everything to me.

Parenting is hard, yo.