blue

Today was a great day. Just a bit ago, D referred to it as a magical day, and I have to agree. It was a super special day for us, and I’ll remember it always.

Unfortunately, now that everything is over and it’s time to face reality once again, I’m feeling a bit melancholy. I have some idea why: work related anxiety combined with feeling under the weather due to the new meds.

It has gotten to the point where I basically live for my time off. All I want to do is spend time with D, the kids, and sometimes with friends. I remember when I used to look forward to going into the office. I’m hoping I’ll feel that way again sometime soon. Maybe if I can get this ridiculous office drama cleared up. The problem, however, is that I don’t particularly want to deal with it. I kind of want to ignore it and just do me for a while. I just really don’t care about anyone else’s feelings at the moment (outside of the family, of course). I kind of just want to be like, “Fuck you, you too, and especially fucking fuck you, dude.”

It’s not the actual work. I still (mostly) like the work. In fact, I have been considering going in tomorrow, locking myself in my office all day, and cranking out a fuck ton of work. I’m at my best when I’m given some space.

My name is on the building, so I figure I should just do whatever the fuck I feel like doing. And if the person whose name is also on the building doesn’t like it, I don’t particularly give a shit.

So…that’s where I am.

 

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