We’re fucking killing it at the law firm. I love tax refund season. I got to pay myself today – and it was more than it has been in a while. It won’t last, but I’ll enjoy it while it does.
Speaking of the law firm, I am trying to decide what the next steps are. I cannot keep going on in this fashion. It’s too much for one person. I have to de-stress my life. It’s just such a big decision, and there are so many factors to consider, and in the face of so much uncertainty. UGH. I’m stressed out just thinking about it. Moving on…
I’ve also been killing it with the working out. It helps that my husband is riding my ass. We’ve been alternating working out at home and going to the gym. I upgraded my membership on Sunday – so now I have access to the different classes, the studios, the women’s only fitness area, and the hydromassage. I’m actually kind of excited about it. We are going back tomorrow night.
Tonight one of my bestie’s came over (Annie), and she joined me and the kiddos for dinner. D was out with a friend. We had a good time. I think she just really needed to see me and hug me.
A week from tomorrow, I’ll be going out with both of my besties at the same time, and I am so pumped. I don’t know why we didn’t do this sooner. I’m thinking we’re going to end up at Sephora and/or Ulta. haha.
Tonight at dinner, the kids asked a bunch of questions about my diagnosis/prognosis. They are trying to wrap their heads around it. It was all very chill – nobody was upset or anything. I think it helps to talk about it. We have to normalize things – this is our new way of life.
I feel like I’m riding an emotional rollercoaster. Sometimes I am fine – almost normal even. Other times, I fall into a deep pit of despair, and I feel like I’m drowning in it. Those times are, luckily, not as frequent as you might think.
D posted a link to Facebook today to try to inform our friends/family about life with metastatic breast cancer, which I really appreciated, because it is a lot different from even my original breast cancer diagnosis. There is no cure. There are a lot of misconceptions. You can read that article here if you are interested.
Every ache and pain in my body screams cancer to me now, and ugh what a way to live.
I have a big hearing tomorrow morning and I am kind of dreading it/kind of looking forward to it. It’s my sweet little old dude’s Chapter 7 liquidation case. He has a big house filled with antiques and collectibles that will be sold by the Trustee, but I’m worried he’s going to be a hot mess giving his testimony, because he is quite old and tends to ramble quite a bit. I’m going to have to keep him from going off the rails, and I’m just kind of nervous about it.
I’m trying to stay busy. It hasn’t been too difficult. I feel like I have a lot on my plate right now.