Insomnia chronicles

Waking up at 4 am is apparently my thing now. I hate it. 4 am is very lonely. Too much time to think.

I never know what to do with myself. Should I get up? Keep lying here until I fall back asleep in a few hours? Ugh.

This morning I decided to get up. I fed the cats. Did some laundry. Smoked some weed. Now I’m on the couch with a book. Maybe I’ll watch TV?

The house smells faintly of smoke from a small fire incident we had earlier while pan searing steaks. That was scary! We almost had to use the extinguisher!!

I probably shouldn’t be drinking Diet Pepsi at 430 am, huh? Oh well.

I have a big to-do list this week, which includes getting my license renewed. It expires on my birthday, and I need to get it resolved before we leave for the beach.

The beach…I can’t stop smiling. The ocean is healing.

I’ve gotten extra introverted lately. I’m not texting anyone. Sometimes I feel guilty about that, but I have to take care of myself first.

Speaking of self care, I really need to stop drinking so fucking much. The answer to my problems will not be found at the bottom of a bottle; I know this, but fuck if the break from reality isn’t nice while it lasts.

Sigh.

At least I’m self-aware of my self-destructive tendencies?

The kids are still on vacation, so we won’t have either of them here tonight, as we typically would. I miss them.

The current situation. Check out that bed head –

And also:

Somehow this post turned into a whole fucking thing. Oops.

I hope you’re sleeping well. ♥️

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