I got up, got dressed up, and headed to court. It is an hour drive from my place to this particular courthouse. About 30 min out, I started feeling extremely sick. About 15 min after that, I had to make an emergency stop at a gas station. It was bad enough that I had to call it – I texted K and told her what was happening. She said she’d call the clerk to explain. Both she and D were worried enough that they offered to pick me up, but I didn’t want to leave my car that far from home. I ended up sitting in the car for a while, drinking water, and that helped. Once the uncontrollable shaking stopped, I drove home.
Chemo can eat my entire dick. It’s difficult not to feel completely worthless when stuff like this happens. I cannot be relied upon anymore. I feel like a burden and a liability. A disappointment. I used to be a fucking bad ass bitch baller.
In other, somewhat related, news, earlier on my drive, a young deer jumped in front of my car. I barely had time to stop. I was very close to him, and we made eye contact for a few seconds before he ran off. He was absolutely stunning, and I’m so grateful he wasn’t hurt. It brought me joy to watch him gallop away. So magestic.