I’m so over doctors. Even the palliative care doc is on my nerves. I just want to be like, “Live it for a while and then get back to me.”

I feel pretty wretched today. Sick and achy, bloated, gross. It never ends.

More family drama today. This time it’s D’s family. I won’t get into the ridiculous details, except to say that his parents still refer to me as his “floozy.”

Freya asked what floozy means, and I told her it’s an old-fashioned way of calling someone a slut.

I ate too many tacos and drank too much alcohol tonight. I just decided I didn’t give a fuck. I’m queasy now.

My face is hideous and fat and I fucking hate it.

Tomorrow is our ten year anniversary. I certainly hope I’m feeling better. We have tickets to go see Wolf Alice tomorrow night. I really want to have a fabulous evening.

I want to wake up transformed.