Last Day Of Spring

Hello, Monday.

Our first floor AC unit stopped working on Friday. We have a guy coming out this morning to look at it. Luckily, the upstairs unit has done a good job of keeping the house cool. Otherwise…ugh. It’s hot as fuck here.

I seem to have swapped nausea for headaches. I’ve had a bad headache every day since Wednesday. As I’m writing this, I’m icing the back of my head and neck. I’m frustrated that something always has to be fucked up for me. I desperately need at least a few days of normality. I can’t accept this as my new normal.

The more I think about canceling the big birthday party, the more I think it’s the right move. I’d rather engage with smaller groups of friends. Maybe I’ll plan several dinner parties with the various friend groups. I think that would be more fun for me. I’m old and tired and dying. I can’t party like I used to. 😂

Frey and I finished up Ginny & Georgia yesterday, and omg I need season 2 right now please. It’s so good. I’m obsessed with Georgia. (If Jackson had been a girl, his name would be Georgia, after my grandmother).

D and I are flying through For All Mankind. We’re almost caught up.

This is a big week for me. Port placement on Wednesday morning. Then starting chemo on Thursday afternoon. Thursday is also Freya’s 16th birthday, though we won’t get to celebrate with her until Monday. We have a friend’s 40th birthday party on Saturday night, and I really hope I’m feeling well enough to go. If nothing else, I at least need to make an appearance.

The internet says I’ll lose my hair about two weeks after treatment starts. I’m trying to decide how to handle that. Most people don’t realize that it actually hurts when the hair releases from the follicle. It’s easier to deal with if the hair is really short. I’m wondering when I should buzz it. Freya says she wants to do it, which means I’d need to buy clippers, which would probably be a good investment, or I could have Mer do it for me. Ugh – I hate that I have to go through this again. On that note, I’m going to go look at wigs now.


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