I feel like I want to write, but I’m not sure about what.

I’ve been getting some very kind messages recently from followers, and it’s so heartwarming to know that this blog has helped people. It seriously means so much to hear it. I do this blog thing for selfish reasons, it’s my diary and digital scrapbook, but to know it resonates with others is very special. Thank you for reaching out.

Today is a weird day of letting go of my helicopter mom tendencies. I let the 16 yo drive the 12 yo to the pool and drop him off about 20 miles away. She’s never driven him alone before. It went fine, of course. I just get so worried about both of them and then I go into mom-worry overdrive. I’m trying to let it go, but it’s hard. They’re my babies, after all. It’s hard to believe Freya is a driver now. 🤯 I track her on Find My Friends whenever she’s driving. 😬

I’m quite fatigued today, and still have heartburn. I’m also high and just sitting around. I want to do something more but I’m so meh right now. Nothing sounds good or right. So I continue to lie here being worthless.

Tomorrow I’m back at the cancer center, but just to get fluids and maybe anti-nausea meds if needed. They set this up for me without my asking, so I think it’s part of my treatment plan. I’m good with it. I could use the fluids. It’s hard to stay hydrated when you’re nauseated. I know Dr. B is very invested in making this treatment work for me.

Picking excursions for the cruise has me all riled up and excited now. I think it’s like 74 days away. So I have time for this treatment to get me back to the best version of myself. I am determined to have this trip be truly epic for us. An amazing memory.

That’s all for now.

xx