Dark Saturday

I feel like everything I post is just ridiculously depressing, which makes me want to just shut the fuck up. But I’ve been blogging for like 20 years, so I’m sure as fuck not going to stop now.

I’m feeling rough as hell today, but I’m hoping I’m healing from V, and am on my way to feeling better soon. Just 11 days until we leave for Greece. I’m going to baby the hell out of myself as much as I can until then, especially my poor stomach, which has taken such a beating.

Wow – 11 days! I need to figure out what I’m bringing to wear. And I need to buy a decent pair of walking shoes. In fact, I’ll do that as soon as I finish up this post.

D and I have been crying on and off a lot recently. We’ve had an extremely tough six months. I’ve blown through 5 treatments so far this year. Afinitor was my last good med. Since then I’ve failed: Xeloda, Abraxane, Enhertu, and now Verzenio. Xeloda was working for me, but I couldn’t handle the side effects. It was way harsh on my GI tract, and was the start of all this gastrointestinal suffering.

This next week is a big one around here. Our 5 year wedding anniversary is Friday. Then we’re having a small Halloween gathering on Saturday night. Nothing like the ragers of years past, just the core friend group. I can’t manage anything else. I think my partying days are well behind me at this point. We wanted to take the kids out for a fancy dinner too, so that will have to be on Sunday, since Frey works Friday night. After all, the wedding was what made us an official family. It’s important that we all celebrate. This could realistically be our last anniversary.

Tonight the plan is to make chicken & rice soup while we watch more Parks And Rec. We’re up to season 2 now. I also started The Watcher this afternoon. It’s another new Ryan Murphy show, also based on a true story. The first episode was fairly creepy. I’ll def watch another. I like the casting too.

Okay that’s all she wrote.


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