Monday Again

Saw Dr. B this afternoon. She wants me to take the rest of this week off for healing, and then restart Halaven on Monday, assuming I’m up for it. She spoke carefully today. She’s trying to set expectations. She’s not saying it’s hopeless, but it’s def unlikely that we will have any big wins moving forward. So now I have to decide what I want. I think I’m willing to try chemo again at a reduced dose, in the hope that it will get me through Christmas. I just really want one more Christmas. After that, I can accept my fate. I’m so tired of fighting. My body is so weak. At this point, I have a difficult time imaging myself alive in even a few months. It just feels so unlikely given how things are going.

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