Yesterday, my upper back started to ache most fiercely. This has happened before – when I was in the hospital – and it occurred to me that it’s likely an indication that the cancer has spread. Feels like it could be from a spinal met. It’s excruciating, and is causing some weakness in my left leg. So that’s fun. A combo of morphine, oxy, Tylenol, and repeated use of the heating pad has barely taken the edge off. It’s always something with this body.

I still don’t have my other issues under control, but they are at least better than they were. I’ll take what I can get.

I don’t know…sometimes I worry that I’m closer to weeks than months. It’s getting harder to imagine still being here a month from now. I don’t know how much more this body can take.

Yesterday, when I was feeling better, I made plans to see friends tonight, and I’m hopeful I can get my pain levels under control so we can honor that. It would do us both good to get out of the house. I just really need to be distracted for a while.

It’s hard to believe Thanksgiving is over. Everyone is now in full on Christmas mode. It’s time to start working on my gifts. I want to get them done early. Just in case. No procrastination this year, Jenn.