Nights have become extremely difficult: sad, lonely, and painful.
The pain has changed. Growth is afoot. I’m worried. It’s paralyzing.
I almost bailed on chemo today, but my husband got me there and took care of me.
There was a question as to whether I’d get it anyway, however, because I’ve apparently lost a concerning amount of weight recently. In the end, it was my call, so I went for it.
Currently reading: A History Of Fear by Luke Dumas. It’s very good so far (at 70%).
I’m really, really worried. Like I’m seriously concerned that my doc is going to recommend hospice after my next scan. I’m expecting the worst. I’m trying to get myself mentally prepared. But that’s easier said than done.
Still – I’m tired of the constant agony.
I’m supposed to go back to the cancer center again tomorrow afternoon, for the third day in a row. Hopefully my body will cooperate.