sigh

It hurts my heart when I see either kid struggling with the issues that pop up from having divorced parents. I wish I could fix it, but all I can do is give hugs, and tell them that we all love them so very much.

It tends to get sticky on weeks like this one where we have one kid all week and so then the other kid feels left out when they’re not here with all of us.

I’d have them both here all the time if I could.

Some stuff has happened recently that’s had me thinking about the influence step-parents have on their step-children. We can’t ever really know in what ways we’ve impacted the development of our children’s personalities (nature vs nurture and all that), but I can see the positive impact D has had on Jackson, and I’m grateful for it. It’s an influence that would have otherwise been lacking in his life, and I believe he’s better for having it. I can only hope I’m making a similar positive impact in Freya’s life.

I also wonder how the other parents view these relationships. Is it difficult for them? Also what impact will their potential future spouses/partners have on the kids? How will D and I feel about that? I have yet to be jealous of Jackson’s interactions with my ex’s gf but will that change if things get more serious between them?

Development is such an interesting topic. I love watching these kids grow up and transition into mini adults.

**this post brought to you by hour three of insomnia.

step-mom ftw

Freya has asked me to teach her how to girl, and by that I mean help her with her hair, fashion, and hygiene. I took her for a trim where she got about two inches cut from her hair. We also picked out a bunch of hair products, and I’ve taught her how to use them all. She’s a huge fan of hair serum now, for example. She’s been sitting around sniffing her hair all day. Just before bed she asked me to give her more hair tips. It’s really cute. She said, “Who knew my hair could smell and look this good!”

I also took her to buy a bunch of new clothes and pajamas for fall. It was fun to help her pick stuff out. She was so excited that she actually cleaned and organized her closet. Ha!

The boy child just couldn’t care less about clothes. So this has been fun for me.

brb crying

I am forever grateful for the friendship of this incredible man. He was my first true best friend. The first person who ever truly knew me. We met in the dorm my freshman year and hit it off almost immediately. He lives in Honolulu now with his fabulous husband. I miss him so very much, and I treasure his friendship more than I can adequately express.

This email was a beautiful gift. ❤️

The post he was referencing can be found here.