fuck it all

Jackson’s school district decided to approve in-person learning for K-8 beginning late October, but are still keeping a virtual option. They told parents about this a few weeks ago. I didn’t think anything of it, because we were originally told that virtual students could decide what to do for the second semester sometime mid-December. That was perfect, because it would allow us to see what happened with Covid during the winter.

Well today I get an email saying that they have changed their minds; we will now be locked in for the entire school year, and we only have 24 hours to change our selection. Given Jackson’s less than stellar performance with virtual learning, we have decided to send him back to school. So as of 10/22, he will be going back. I am super conflicted about it, and seriously displeased with the way this was handled. I get that this is an administrative nightmare for the school district, but I was relying upon what they said, and now everything is turned upside down. I feel absolutely blindsided.

Ugh. Ugh. Ugh.

We had a teacher conference this afternoon, which cemented for me that sending him back is the right choice for him academically. He is not thriving. I have this nagging voice in the back of my head, however, telling me that I may have just fucked the health of the entire family. It’s like I told his dad though: there is no good choice here.

Fuck Covid.
Fuck Trump.
Fuck anti-maskers.
Fuck cancer.
And fuck 2020.

The monotony is killing me/us

I’m so bored and over this fucking quarantine bullshit that I just cleaned a toilet for fun.


There is a DMB concert on right now, and I don’t even care. I’m tired of everything.

D and I have decided we’re both going into our offices tomorrow and spending the day away from home. Then we will meet up on the evening and go get dinner.

I need a break from this house. It’s starting to feel like a prison.

covid concerns

My ex-husband’s gf might have Covid, so Jackson will be staying here until we know.

I’m really nervous about school starting in the fall, and I’m not sure I’m going to send him back with things as they are. I wish Parkway would announce their plan so that I could make a decision. I’d prefer online with limited in-person instruction. If they don’t offer online learning, I’m seriously considering signing him up for a private online school. I’ve started looking into options.

I wish we had good leadership. This would have been hard regardless, but we’re stuck with an incompetent, narcissistic man child as our president, and cases surging in the US. I don’t know what to do, but I know I’m not sending him back with things as they are now.

Freya has been going to marching band practice every day for the last week, and I hate that too. From what I’ve observed, social distancing is not being taken seriously. I know our kids need a social outlet, but I have a bad feeling about this. If it were my decision, it wouldn’t be happening. Her safety (and ours) is more important than her social life.

Ugh. What a shitty year. Fuck you, 2020.