Stay On The Ride

I keep trying to organize my thoughts into a post, but I’m failing miserably. It’s because I’m high af, I’m pretty sure.

Enhertu #2 was today, and I was pleasantly surprised by the treatment area down at Big Barnes. I got to lounge in an actual bed today. That combined with the benadryl knocked me out for most of the treatment.

I met with Dr. B (and her fellow), and neither of them were super concerned about the abdominal and foot swelling, but Dr. B does want an ultrasound of my belly to check it out. She thinks it could be ascites that we may be able to drain. I hope that’s the case, because I’d love some relief.

Not feeling too hot right now. Bloated, queasy, and exhausted. My limbs feel heavy. My muscles ache. And so it begins!

I’ll just lie here and fantasize about how fabulous the last two weeks of this cycle will be; how fun it will be. All the people I will see. All the things I will do. ♥️

random thoughts 

Do you remember that game show Supermarket Sweep? I used to really dig that shit. I’d watch it when I got home from school, while I was eating my after school snack. Well…not a snack so much as a couple thousand calorie binge. Usually that was the first food I would have eaten all day because I had this weird eating issue where I wouldn’t let other people see me eat. Keep in mind, however, that I was also extremely underweight. When I graduated from high school, I was almost 5’7 and weighed 104 pounds. Sometimes I’d skip lunch period to hide in a bathroom stall and read so that people wouldn’t ask me questions about food. I was a truly strange and fucked up teenager. 

Oh and I also remember that my high school boyfriend called me sunshine, not because I was bright and cheery, but as a dig because I was dark, moody, and sarcastic. 

Not much has changed in that regard.