Conversations with clients 

I met with an old guy today who drove three hours to meet with me. 

Me: Why didn’t you meet with an attorney in your area regarding this? 

Him: I saw your picture on Facebook and I knew it had to be you. 

Me: That’s…creepy. 

Him: Well you told me I had to be truthful. 

Me: *sigh* Fair enough. 


I wish my clients would take a deep breath and think about what they’re going to say before it comes out of their mouths.

If I hear one more time, “This bankruptcy ruined my life,” I’m gonna lose my shit.

Oh did it? Did getting rid of that $100,000.00 in debt ruin your life, Martha? I’m so fucking sorry to hear that.

That’s basically how I respond to them, because I don’t even give a fuck anymore. I’m so fucking sorry that you got rid of all of your debt but now you can’t turn around and immediately buy a house because you have shitty credit. Cry me a motherfucking river, my dude.



I miss when a day off was really a day off instead of a day full of frantic texts and emails about various legal issues.  I plan on telling them to fuck off with that bullshit during my honeymoon. They can figure it the fuck out. Unless the place is burning down…idgaf.

okay then…

Our firm offers the option for clients to text us. It’s often used, which is cool, but sometimes we get texts that weren’t meant for us. Like today, a traffic client who had been dealing with our Alex sent us the following text:

Alex…stupid! I was not even able to obtain an engagement ring and I was with you physically for a long time.

To which we responded: Was this text meant for B&A LLC?

To which she responded: No!


I don’t even know where to start, so I’ll just leave it.