a rando list

  • This is my last full day in the office so I’m making the most of it. I’ve gotten a good deal done so far, but I’m slowly burning out.
  • Tomorrow I have to leave early for wedding related stuff: take Jackson to pick up his suit, and then head down to the city for our rehearsal & dinner.
  • On Thursday, I’m going to court in the morning and then I’m off until Tuesday.
  • But…on Tuesday morning I have court early in KC so I’m trying to decide whether to drive in the night before and stay at a hotel.
  • I weighed in this morning and I’m down another pound. I’m not even really trying so fuck yeah.
  • People, unfortunately, think of the couch in my office as an invitation to hang out.
  • If you think I share too much here, you should see the shit I decide against posting.
  • We are going out tonight and I CANNOT WAIT.
  • I was briefly sad, but I’m over it for now.


a sunday seven list post

  1. I ended up having to sleep in Freya’s room last night because she was scared. Haha. I told her she leveled up too quickly.
  2. Today’s mission is to acquire wedding shoes for D, Jack, and Frey. This requires a trip to the Converse store. I already purchased white ribbon laces for Freya on Amazon. It feels good to check things off this ever shrinking list.
  3. After shopping, the four of us are venturing down to the city to spend time with friends.
  4. Last night, we made the first chicken & wild rice soup of the season, and it was just as delightful as always. D makes fun of me for putting a dash of hot sauce in mine, but he can hate away because the hot sauce makes it extra awesome.
  5. Hey, I’m from Ferguson, okay?
  6. It’s cold outside today and I fucking love it. Bring on all the chilly weather, storms, and fires. D just turned off the air conditioning, and I hope that’s finally done for the year.
  7. 6 days, 7 hours, 8 minutes, and 18 seconds.


  • Today was my first ren faire. Jack’s, too. Jackson LOVED the joust. D loved the giant turkey leg (lol) and the beer. Freya and I left with flower crowns. (I wore mine to the grocery store after. You can imagine the looks I got. Haha.) Jackson left with a shield. D wanted a real sword, and I *almost* convinced him to leave with it, but it was too expensive considering our super expensive wedding we are still paying for.
  • When we got home he looked at me and said, “I should have bought that sword.” I almost kicked him.
  • There is always next year. I had my head turned by many expensive costumes. I will definitely buy one next year when I’m not paying for a fancy ass wedding.
  • We didn’t start out expecting the wedding to be so much, but we have expensive taste, so…
  • Speaking of the wedding, we are essentially one month out. Squeeeeeee! Our friends were like: you have to make a registry because we’re going to buy you shit and we want it to be shit you actually like. So we made one on Amazon tonight and it was actually really fun. It’s a work in progress, but it is mostly games, booze, records, and miscellaneous nerdy shit. Love.
  • Last night, D and I went to the city to hang with C & J (and another couple) to celebrate J’s bday. She’s 33. (She makes me feel old. She makes D feel even older.) We love them though. They’re about to have a baby…like she will pop anytime now. I’m so excited for them!!!! I can’t wait to babysit.
  • I’ve been in a ridiculous amount of pain this weekend. I’m worried the Otezla isn’t working/isn’t going to work. I don’t want to think about that right now though. I can’t deal.
  • I want to get back to running. D and I have a running date tomorrow. I hope my knee(s) cooperates.
  • I’m off tomorrow (yay!). I have brunch plans with Carrie. Can’t wait!

a sunday night list post: 11:43 pm

  • I don’t have to go to work tomorrow. *happy dance*
  • Today was Day 7 of my fitness challenge/accountability group. I had my shake. I did 21 Day Fix Total Cardio Fix this afternoon, and then tonight Dave, Jackson, and I went on a 2.6 mile run/walk.
  • Both of our kids still have training wheels on their bikes. Freya is 11 and she is taking a bike with training wheels to camp for fuck’s sake. Jackson is almost 8 and he can’t keep up with the boys in the neighborhood because of his training wheels. This is an epic parenting fail on our part and we are determined to fix it.
  • Speaking of bikes, I’m going to buy one this fall.
  • Tomorrow is weigh in day. I’m scared. haha.
  • Our exes never come into the house. It’s weird. At least D’s ex comes to the door. Mine won’t even leave the fucking driveway. *eyeroll*
  • We picked out our wedding invitations today! I’m placing the order tomorrow. Shit is getting real.
  • I have a bunch of other little things to get done. I need to decide if I’m wearing a veil (and if so I need to buy it). I need to book our hotel rooms. I need to get our limo booked. I need to get Freya a dress. I need to, I need to, I need to…it’s never ending.
  • This season of Game of Thrones is so fucking bad ass. I can’t stop fan girling over it.
  • I got fairy wings, a fairy wand, and a set of kick ass grey & pink metal dice from friends for my birthday. I’m all set for Saturday’s D&D campaign!
  • This was a crazy awesome weekend and I’m sad it’s coming to an end.


Five things you’d find in my bag:

  1. iPhone
  2. wallet 
  3. lip gloss (glossy gloss and rose gloss currently)
  4. several blue ink pens (for work & court…all legal docs must be signed in blue ink)
  5. oversized, black, cat-eye sunglasses 

Five things in my bedroom:

  1. a super cozy platform bed
  2. lazy, fat tabby cat lounging upon said bed 
  3. me, buried under a pile of blankets,  cuddling said cat, and blogging via my iPhone about stuff that literally nobody  else cares about. 
  4. so much Lularoe 😌
  5. books, photos, jewelry, and tarot…oh my!

Five things I want to do in life:

  1. grow old with D
  2. sell my law firm and make mad bank $$$$$$
  3. travel to many unusual locales
  4. laugh a lot
  5. eat, drink, and be merry (and married)

Five things that make me happy:

  1. My (soon to be) husband 
  2. Our kids 
  3. Music
  4. My gorgeous home. 
  5. wine & weed & zero fucks given…they all make jenn a happy girl.

Five things I’m currently into:

  1. LipSense
  2. Skin care: Neutrogena Hydroboost everything is my jam right now, but I’m still going to make an appointment with a top notch dermatologist to get Tri-Luma and chemical peels for this old ass face of mine. 
  3. Poetry. I have some  to share.
  4. Interior decorating 
  5. Being the best possible version of me.

Five things on my to-do list:

  1. Get my PsA meds approved sometime in my lifetime.
  2. Be healthier.
  3. Write poems. 
  4. Date myself. 
  5. Get it. (It being: whatever the fuck I want).

Tagging anyone who wants to do this. ❤️

forever and a day

that’s how long it feels when I’m looking forward to something. I’m currently looking forward to the following:

  • I’m skipping out of work at 3 today so I can get a mani/pedi on the way home.  I need a bit of pampering. Gotta get through a few appointments first, as well as a pile of cases, and just…ugh.
  • D and I have a date night planned at home. We are going to pick up some lovely alcoholic bevs and drink them in the great room while we listen to records and chat about our days. then we will make dinner and do our regular Thursday night things. OMG can’t wait. Our Thursday nights give me life.
  • Winery day on Saturday with some of our best couple friends. D told me the high will be only 85, which is way better than I was expecting so YAY.
  • On Monday, my Beachbody team will officially start our Shift Shop challenge and I am pumped to get started. I need this.
  • In approximately one week, I will be taking 8 glorious vacation days away from the law firm. It’s just a staycation, but I plan to nourish my soul. I have day dates planned with two of my besties: Ann & Carrie. I’m going to do a bunch of reading, and sleeping, and exercising. I’m going to plan at least one outing where I “date” myself. I’m very much looking forward to it and it feels soooooo far away.
  • The wedding. It’s a little over three months away now. Ahhhh!!!!! Squee, squee, squee. Sometimes I’ll be driving and I’ll hear a song that is on our wedding playlist and I’ll start tearing up because OMFG I’m getting to marry the love of my life and it’s going to be so amazing and I can’t wait and *squuuuuuuuueeeeeeeeeeeeeeee*.

truthful tuesday: a list post

  • I like Amy Schumer and idgaf.
  • I hate my current haircut. I think my stylist did a shitty job.
  • And I think I’m being too much of a scared little bitch to do what I really want with my hair because I’m worried I need to look a certain way on my wedding day. (I want to chop it all off like right now and go back to my short, jet black, pixie hair).
  • I bought my mom a Mother’s Day card for the first time in years. Now I just need to mail it off.
  • I’ll feel lucky if my ex even remembers to have Jackson give me/make me a card for Mother’s Day.
  • It feels sort of weird to be in a position where I’m helping my step-daughter pick out and buy presents for her mom for Mother’s Day. And even weirder that I’m strangely excited about helping out with it.
  • That said, I think Mother’s Day is a stupid holiday that makes a lot of people feel bad needlessly. Not all of us have good relationships with our mothers. Not all of us have living mothers. That’s important to remember.
  • For example, I offered to buy D a card to send to his mom and he declined. Given what I know about the situation, I can’t blame him, but I know he will feel a little shitty about things on Sunday and that makes me sad for him.
  • This weekend is my bestie’s birthday. We are going out tonight for dinner. I have yet to buy her any gifts. I’m probably going to get her a fat gift card to Ulta and call it a day.
  • Her birthday always reminds me of getting separated, because it was on her birthday five years ago that the ex and I broke up. It also happened to be Mother’s Day. Double fucking whammy, right?
  • It was at her birthday party five years ago (the night before her actual b-day), that I took a good look at him and decided enough was enough. I simply couldn’t do it anymore.
  • It’s scary how much you can love somebody until you simply don’t anymore.
  • It’s also scary how much you can think you love somebody, until you find somebody else you love more, and then you feel confused about what your feelings really were. It’s a bit of a mind fuck.
  • All those little hurts add up, people. Don’t forget that.
  • This post is sort of dark, but I promise I’m actually in a pretty good mood.
  • Despite the fact that I’m probably going to get yelled at by the judge tomorrow morning.
  • Send booze, cake, and Xanax.

boring bullets

  • It’s raining again.
  • It better not rain this weekend. We have Microfest (beer festival) on Saturday and we are staying at a hotel in the city. We have many plans. Almost all of which involve being outside.
  • I need a fun, adult oriented weekend god dammit.
  • I have been in a bit of a reading funk recently. I’ve been in a bad headspace. I’m finally back to it. I finished a couple of books yesterday. Last night I (barely) started Into the Water by Paula Hawkins. She’s the author of The Girl On The Train. Just a couple more essays to go and I’ll be finished with One Day We’ll All Be Dead And None Of This Will Matter, which is really good btw.
  • I shouldn’t risk it, but if my knee continues to improve I’m going to do another 30DS tonight. (30 day shred workout). It’s hard on the knees, but it is so fucking effective.
  • I have a bunch of wedding appointments to make. I have emails about scheduling the engagement photo session and our menu tasting. I also need to email the lady about what cake flavors we want to try next weekend.  Oh and respond to the florist about setting up a consultation. And…I just want to hide under the blankets.
  • I’ve gotten really shitty about responding to texts.
  • I’m in this weird meh headspace. I just don’t give much of a shit about most stuff.
  • I think I’m going to read for a bit and then maybe watch a movie.
  • Sorry this post is so fucking boring.
  • xoxo

Things (in my head)

  • This is the worst part of every weekend. Fucking Sunday night anxiety. 
  • I took a sleeping pill. 
  • I’m feeling very unwell and have for most of the weekend. 
  • I enjoyed the Girls finale. The final scene made me cry. I identified with Hannah more than ever before in that last moment.
  • D and I have been watching that show for our entire relationship so it feels bittersweet that it’s over. 
  • But…House of Cards soon.
  • Dave is such a good DM. We had our best adventure ever on Saturday night. 
  • The kids are growing up too fast. 
  • Very bad body image day. 
  • I found a new horror author I really dig so now I’m going to read all her books in a row…obviously. 
  • D installed our bedroom ceiling fan and it has made a huge difference. I love it. 
  • We tried something new today: escape room. We did the mummy themed room and managed to make it out in less than the hour time limit. 
  • There’s a King Tut exhibit at the science center I want to go to soon. I may cut out of work early one day this week to go check it out. 
  • I’m feeling angsty. 
  • Clean sheets feel so amazing. 
  • We have a good thing going here. ❤

stuff that happened last night

  • sat at a bar drinking Sprite. i haven’t done that since i was a kid.
  • (yes, i sat at lots of bars as a kid. my childhood was…interesting.)
  • went to a favorite place for the first time in a while only to discover it has gone downhill. boo.
  • scallops with mushroom risotto and goat cheese cream for dinner. nom.
  • insomnia cookies. their s’mores cookie may be the tastiest cookie ever. i am so grateful to not live in their delivery area anymore. my waistline couldn’t handle it.
  • ran through the streets of the cwe in a dress and extremely uncomfortable flats. for reasons.
  • heard the chiming of the grandfather clock for the first time in months.
  • impulse shopped a lularoe pop-up after indulging in some herbal refreshment. the late night impulse shopping happens more than i’d like to admit.
  • business time. *insert winky face*
  • dmb live at piedmont park dvd.
  • talking and dreaming and planning with my gingy.
  • took a sleeping pill and passed the fuck out.

five for friday

  1. I watched the inauguration today. It was painful and it made me sad. And teary eyed. And panicky. That’s all I want to say about that right now.
  2. My pal, Kara, flew in from Denver today. We have had a fun day catching up. She’s in bed now so I have some alone time before D and I hang out.
  3. My business partner’s wife is the lead organizer for the women’s march in Saint Louis. Our firm donated (because duh) and our name is prominently displayed on the back of the event shirt, which is really fucking cool. Not so much because of publicity (though that is awesome) but just because I’m so proud to support such a vital protest.
  4. Tonight Frey told me that she has thought of me as her step-mom for a long time now, that she calls me such to her friends at school, and also tells them that I’m the best/coolest step-mom ever. I almost cried. My heart is so full, you guys.
  5. Social media is so nasty today. I wish people didn’t have to be so hateful. Both sides are guilty of this.

Happy October! 🎃

It’s my favorite month! ❤️

  • I have a goal of running a mile per day this month, so at least 31 miles total. I’m off to a good start with a 3 mile run!
  • The weather is perfect. It’s currently 68 degrees. We have the windows open. 
  • Speaking of windows, today’s home improvement project was covering the huge window in the master bath. Now I can be naked without worrying someone can see (or catching them looking in…ugh). Woot! 
  • Sorry, boys. Show is over. 😘
  • We have new neighbors. A young couple with a toddler. 
  • D and I are doing a Breaking Bad binge watch just because. 
  • Tacos tonight. Mmm.
  • I love Saturdays!