home is where the heart is

Last night was so good and chill. Yummy Chinese food and good conversation followed by Sunny and The Office. We were going to watch the new Thor movie but decided to save it till tonight. I know there’s a breast cancer subplot, so I’m prepared to cry.

I look awful in this pic, but I’ve decided to take and post even the bad ones.

Memories ♥️

about last night

D was craving tamales, so we went out for Mexican. I decided to treat myself to a strawberry marg, which was delicious, but made my stomach hurt. Alcohol doesn’t sit well for me anymore, which is a real bummer considering how much I’ve always enjoyed it.

Things got a little emotional at dinner as we talked about some cancery stuff. We just feel so ripped off, and it’s hard not to be bitter. Still, we agree that we can still milk some good out of life, and that’s the plan. Live big!

PS: I was wearing a long black dress with the purple wig and glasses. D said I looked edgy, like the cool girl in college who wouldn’t talk to him. I just thought that was cute and worth noting. ♥️

In Another Life

D and I had planned to move to the country after the kids left for college. We were going to build a castle. I was going to raise two huskies, maybe buy a horse, start a rose garden. I’d have a library filled with all sorts of lovely vintage books. There would be a dressing room with plenty of shoe racks and a huge vanity, with its own bathroom. We would be close to the Katy Trail, and would ride our bikes to the wineries, where we’d buy bottles for the wine cellar. I’m currently mourning the loss of that dream. It would have been so lovely to grow old with him there.

Thursday??

I never know what day of the week it is anymore. I have no schedule. It will be easier to remember when the kids go back to school.

D and I went out for a bit of lunch and shopping.

We decided on a day date instead of a date night. We’re old and tired. Plus, he still has that covid fatigue.

I bought a few cutesy things while we were on Main Street down in the Saint Charles historic district. I may go to the big Saint Charles Co Library book fair this weekend too, if I can find the energy. I’m in a shopping mood.

D looks sad in the pic because he is sad. We’re both on the struggle bus right now. Living this reality is extremely fucking difficult. We feel robbed. We’re on borrowed time, and even though we know we need to make the most of it, it’s easy to get sucked into depression.

Still, we’re both grateful for this quiet weekend alone. I forgot that he’s traveling again next week, so I need to get in some quality time.

A good day

I felt pretty decent today.

D and I played Civ VI together for like three hours this afternoon. It was fun.

♥️♥️♥️

I’m hoping for another good day tomorrow. I’d like to spend some quality time with Jackson.

Oh and tomorrow night is new Better Call Saul FINALLY.