progress report

I’ve been taking Otezla for 17 days now, and it still making me sick, but it’s sporadic now.

I exercised this morning for the first time since starting it and that was really hard. I felt like I had no energy and even got a little light headed. But I endured. I’ll work my way back up to where I was.

#NoBoozeSeptember will be put to the test tonight. I usually drink quite a bit of wine on D&D nights, but not tonight. I’ll be hitting the Diet Pepsi hard, though. D is planning to get several cases when he goes to the store. It’s going to be a heavy DP month.

He enjoys that I call it DP because he’s a dirty perv. I wouldn’t have it any other way.

I don’t really think I’ll miss beer all that much. I was a big craft beer person from about 2013 to 2016, but now I’m just sort of meh about it. The only beers I even really enjoy at this point are: Bell’s Two Hearted (my all time fav), 4Hands Divided Sky & 4Hands Resurrection. I’m sort of glad I’m “off” beer, because it has made me fat.

I’m more of a wine drinker now, and my tastes have gotten quite expensive, so a little break from that habit isn’t such a bad thing either. Haha.

Back to Otezla: so I’m 17 days in, and I haven’t had any flares during that time, which is very impressive. Normally, my right knee would have gotten swollen to the point of barely being able to walk (and causing me to cry) at least 2 times by now. I’m cautiously optimistic that this is going to work for me. Another good sign? I stopped treating my scalp psoriasis with topical steroids and yet it seems to be getting better.

FUCK YESSSSSSSSS

I have 20 pounds I’d like to lose, but realistically I will be content with losing 10. I’d like to do so before the wedding, but I’d be happy with 5 to 8, which I feel is quite doable, though not with my previous drinking habits: hence, #NoBoozeSeptember.

Some people would tell me just to drink less and not cut it out completely, but I know myself, and once I pop, I can’t stop…ya feel me?

Also, I want to prove to myself that I can do it. D did something similar right after I met him, which is sort of where I got the idea. I have a lot of willpower so I’m not terribly concerned. The biggest tests will be: a bad day at the office *and* our first Friday night steak dinner without wine.

I have a few hours before our guest start to arrive, so I guess I should go enjoy my relaxation time while I can.

xoxo

 

 

misery business

Yesterday was my first day at full dosage of Otezla. I felt bad throughout the day with some stomach problems and a headache, but nothing I couldn’t work through. Then after last night’s pill, I woke up with what felt like the worst stomach flu ever. Chills, nausea, vomiting…etc. I couldn’t even walk because I was so dizzy. I crawled to the bathroom and ended up lying on the floor until D came to check on me. 

I’m slightly better this morning, but still feel outrageously bad. I just took my next dose and cried a little because I’m scared of feeling like that again. 

This shit better work. I will make it through this phase with the hopes that this is my miracle drug. I’m going to be extremely disappointed if it’s not. Chances are I won’t know for sure for several months. 

I’m bummed because I left my laptop and kindle at the office last night when D and I left, because I figured I’d be right back in the morning. Now I’m stuck at home without my stuff. Booooooo. 

It’s hard to believe

but my Otezla starter pack will be delivered on Wednesday. I have fought so hard to get this medicine (literally for years now…since breast cancer remission) and it is finally on its way to me. Holy fuck. Of course, I had to pay an ugly $300 copay, but at least it’s not $2000, right? Haha. Now that this is finally happening, I’m starting to feel a bit nervous. Chances are I’m going to be quite ill for a few weeks as I adjust to the side effects. As long as I’m adjusted by the wedding…that’s all I care about. Please send good vibes that these meds will work for me. I was walking around all weekend feeling like a 90-year-old because of how bad my joints have gotten. If this doesn’t work, I don’t have any other options for at least a year.

fucking finally!!!!!

United Healthcare approved my psoriatic arthritis meds for coverage, and I’m so relieved/happy/excited/nervous…lots of emotions. I’m also slightly frustrated because these meds can only be administered through a special mail order pharmacy which has been a bit of a nightmare to deal with. But still…progress. I should be able to start within the next couple of weeks. I’m nervous because I’ve read that the first few weeks are really rough with the various side effects. I’m hopeful that this will provide me with some relief though.

*squeeeeeeeeeee*

This is a really big deal for us. I honestly don’t know who is happier: me or D. I had sort of resigned myself to the fact that I would be forced to live with this untreated condition for the rest of my life.  Now there is hope again. I really, really hope this works for me.

just putting this out there

Being upset with someone for having to cancel plans due to their chronic pain condition(s) is extremely shitty and selfish. Trust me, I’m a lot more upset about it than you are, bro. You know, since I’m actually the one in pain. Being disappointed is understandable, but being passive aggressive about it is just fucked up. Thanks for making me feel worse than I already do. 👍🏻