a day in the life: work day edition

9:20 am

I’m going to just type things here in this text box as they come to me throughout the day.

Those sleeping pills work, dude. Maybe too well.

My 9:00 appointment canceled. They always cancel. I don’t know why the ladies even bother setting them.

Traffic was beautiful today. I love driving on holidays.

I like staying home on holidays more tho. lol.


10:25 am

So far 3 out of 3 appointments have either canceled or no-showed. This is typical. Especially in the mornings.

At least it’s giving me time to get caught up on other stuff.

Just got an invite to N’s birthday party on 2/8. It’s a super small gathering. Beer & games at URB/Recess. Should be fun. Our February is already booking up. D and I want to go on a mini weekend vacay the weekend of Feb 21st. We’re thinking Memphis. Then that Sunday night, I have a ticket to see Rent!! And let’s not forget Valentine’s Day! I love Valentine’s Day!


10:58 am

Why are so many people comfortable with being late? It’s a huge pet peeve of mine. It’s so fucking disrespectful. On time to a professional appointment is at least 10 minutes before the scheduled appointment. I’ll give you a pass if you at least show up at the appointment time, but people who walk in ten to twenty minutes late like it’s no big deal: ooh that shit really fucking enrages me.


11:26 am

My 2020 rule of not working for free is starting to piss a lot of people off – including my staff.

People know what the rules are. If they choose not to follow the rules, I refuse to let that be my problem anymore. I’m done with this shit.

I’m extremely fucking annoyed.


12:16 pm

No longer annoyed. My mood swings, dude, let me tell you. Hey, I’m Cancer sun and Cancer moon. It goes with the territory.

I just finished my go-to Bread Co salad, aka The Jenn Special: half chicken caesar salad with extra dressing and add gorgonzola.

I think I need to cut way back on my drinking again. It has creeped up these past two weeks. We’ve had a lot of shit going on though. Soon I’ll be on oxy for a bit – so I won’t be able to drink. It will be easy to go full-on Keto during my recovery week. I’m hoping to lose a couple of pounds. I need to see the 140s again!!

Though, honestly, I haven’t been getting any complaints. If you know what I mean.

People who wait until the day before a foreclosure sale to call an attorney are baffling to me. And then they’re like: drop everything to save my house, but I don’t have any money to pay you.

cool, cool, cool. PASS.

One of my favorite work related things is when someone calls for a quote, then talks shit about the amount, hangs up on us, and then calls back like 30 minutes later to hire us. Yep. We’re a good deal, motherfucker, but now the price has gone up. *shrugs* Don’t be a dick!


12:42 pm

Five of the seven afternoon appointments have confirmed. Not that this really means anything. Haha.


3:30 pm

I just finished four back-to-back consultations.


Now I’m eating a beef stick and some cheese. Mmm.


3:39 pm

Some lady called here earlier wanting to file Ch 13 to stop the sale of her home scheduled for tomorrow fucking afternoon. Then I find out that the real estate is actually owned by her LLC, and she was going to go quit claim it into her own name. So I was like nah pass. I’m not in the mood to fuck with any of that shit today. Fast forward to just now, when a fellow bk attorney just told me that this chick also called her, and it turns out she has committed all kinds of fraud – including forging the judge’s name in a previous bankruptcy case. HOLY FUCK. Bullet dodged.


4:37 pm

Today I had two (male) clients not believe I was the attorney because apparently I look too young. On the one hand, it’s kind of a compliment, right? But, on the other hand, how rude for you to ask what my age is, random man who came in to discuss bankruptcy. My age is old enough to be the only attorney in the room, bro.


The office closes in 20 minutes, and I will be heading to a local bar/restaurant to meet up with Carrie. It will be good to see her and get caught up. Despite what I mentioned earlier in this post, I think I’ll be having a drink tonight. It has been a long day.

Not gonna lie: I’m dreading trying to park in the CWE and then walk in the freezing cold to the restaurant, but it will be worth it. Something I really enjoy about the suburbs are the fucking parking lots.






3 hours of sleep is not enough sleep. You’d think I’d be used to it by now though. I guess I am…I’m exhausted but I’m still getting shit done.

Court this morning was interesting. The nice judge lost her shit on this loser attorney who is always fucking stuff up. It was good to hear/see her finally woman the fuck up and put the smack down. Lawyers like him give the rest of us a bad name.

I was scheduled to have lunch with my sister today. I put aside two hours that I couldn’t spare to do so, because hey…making an effort. But now that the day is actually here…*crickets*. It’s fine. I knew this would happen. This is why I don’t try.

I’m not sad. I’m resigned. It suits me just fine actually.

So I’ve ordered yet another salad from Bread Co, and I am going to crank out some work before these afternoon appointments start showing up.

As of now, we are still set to go out with J&M tonight. We considered rescheduling because of how little sleep we got, but it isn’t like we would go home and go to bed. We would stay up and do shit, so we might as well be social.

Oh and I almost forgot: I AM OFF TOMORROW. I am going to sleep in and it is going to be motherfucking glorious. I am not doing any work either. Fuck that noise. I am going to be a lazy piece of shit until I have to take my little shit demon kitten to the vet at 3:30.

So funny (to me) story: I was having an impossible time getting my hair to curl these last several weeks, and I was so pissy about it. I read a bunch of articles and watched YouTube videos. I couldn’t figure out why my hair suddenly wouldn’t hold a curl. Then I read this article that was like, “You can’t complain about your hair not curling if you are still using that same busted ass curling iron from 1999.” (Okay so that’s paraphrased, but you get the idea) So then the light bulb went off, and I was like…Oh shit this curling iron is old as fuck. I bought it way back in the day when I had long hair, but then I went through like 8 years of having short hair and didn’t use it much.  It’s old as fuck. I went and bought a new one yesterday, and it’s just a cheap drugstore Conair or some such shit, but IT WORKS. My hair easily and quickly curled this morning, and it only took about 20 minutes. This makes me happier than it should, but one of the reasons I wanted to grow my hair out was to make it all curly and princess like. So here we are. Woo.

It’s the little things sometimes.

Okay – now I will actually do some work.


Welcome to 2020!

  • The first list post of the new year!
  • Speaking of firsts, my first selfie of the year was of me smoking a joint.
  • We didn’t see the ball drop, because we were busy banging our friends. 🤷🏻‍♀️
  • There were literally fireworks going off during the sexing. It was funny.
  • In other (non-sex) news, we took all the Christmas stuff down, and it feels great in the house. It makes it obvious that we really need to get some drapes in the big living room, tho.
  • I finally got D to switch to the darkside. #vagueblogging
  • The Napa trip is being planned! Sounds like probably June. It can’t conflict with Deer Creel DMB weekend though!! I need the tour dates to be released. Come on, February!!
  • As of this morning, I’m down six pounds. Official weigh in isn’t until tomorrow morning, though.
  • But…I haven’t cracked yet! Though I’d gladly cut a bitch for a cookie.
  • I can’t believe I have to go to work tomorrow. Fuuuuuuuuck me.
  • I’m not going to proofread this before I post it…fuck it.

Greetings on this last day of 2019

Here I am at the office.

No filter. I’m trying to be better about that. Love the skin you’re in, and all that jazz.

We’re closing early today. Gonna grab something to eat on my way home. I have nobody to pick up! It’s a rare treat. The entire family is already at home.

D and I are hanging with N&N tonight. Not sure what time that’s getting started. I’m already tired, so cool, cool, cool. Ha! I’m grateful they only live five minutes away.

I am super pumped to have the day off tomorrow. I’m going to try to sleep in, though I doubt I’ll be able to do so.

Time is flying. I keep thinking I have more time than I actually do for various things, like SAD Prom. Oh and our couples date on Saturday night…I thought that was two or three weeks out. My surgery date will be here before I know it. So much to do. January is going to be super busy, but that’s good because it means less time to be depressed.

Alrighty…I should wrap a few things up before it’s time to leave. I will leave you with this:

the monday night d.l.

  • Tequila has zero carbs. 🙌🏻
  • My actual kids might not need me so much anymore, but my three fur kids are obsessed with me, and actively fight for my attention.
  • I’m going to need to make a low carb dessert this week. I’m a little bit on the struggle bus, and I feel like doing so will help me think I’ve indulged.
  • Ooh I just pinned a recipe for cauliflower mac and cheese. What does it say about me that it legitimately sounds delicious? I’ve developed a love for cauliflower these last couple of years.
  • Tomorrow is NYE. The last day of the year and the decade. How the fuck did that happen, bro? We are hanging with N&N tomorrow night. No matter what happens, it’s guaranteed to be fun and chill. That’s our group vibe.
  • My office closes at 2 pm tomorrow and there’s no court so motherfucking hallelujah praise hands for real.
  • I’m horny af.
  • I’m already obsessing over what to wear on Saturday night. More on that later.
  • Oh and I need a dress for SAD Prom. I’m running out of time. Gotta get a dress, decorations, flowers, etc. I’m going to make a boozy punch. I’m excited.
  • And that’s all she wrote.

The last Monday of the year…

And I’m just not feeling it, dude. I’m not feeling well (I think it’s carb withdrawal), and the inadequate sleep last night isn’t helping.

See…I look very meh today:

Also: big hair, don’t care. I didn’t wash it this morning, because I have no energy for that today. It’s gotten so long now that washing and styling it is an ordeal.

In the background, you can see a sliver on my new office. It’s not ready for pics yet. I have more furniture to move, and stuff to hang yet.

Guess who’s here today?

I picked him up on the way in this morning. It’s his dad’s 40th birthday, and dad wants to go out and do adult things, so I can get extra kid time. He’s also letting me have him on New Years Day. So I’ll have him almost all week. ❤️

Anyway…he will be in the office until D picks him up this afternoon while I’m at court. Ugh…fucking court. I’m going to the two worse dockets today, and one is a hearing for a really shitty client. Boo.

I suppose I should force myself to work. It doesn’t seem that my 9 am appointment is going to show up. Shocking!

I think I can. I think I can.

the Sunday situation

I have had an awful headache all freaking day. I hope it’s gone when I wake up tomorrow.

I wasted the entire weekend. I did zero work. I mean…I did like housework, but no legal work. Whatever. Idgaf.

The calendar for the upcoming week is a fucking shit show: multiple court dockets per day and plans almost every night. Dis-motherfucking-like.

I got to see C today, and we opened our Secret Elf gifts. My lady fucking nailed it. C’s did too. We got lucky.


We put up the other two Christmas trees tonight, though one needs the lights replaced, so it’s not yet decorated. But here are the two that are finished:

And then this cuteness happened at bedtime:

Oh and I almost forgot: we finished TNG tonight. I’m still processing it, but I thought the last episode was great, and I’m sad that it’s over. However, I’m looking forward to re-watching the movies, and also checking out the other series. Oh and the new Picard series, of course.

I am having a bad body image day. It doesn’t help that I haven’t exercised in over a week. Gotta get back to it starting tomorrow.

While at the grocery store tonight, some random dude walked up and asked me if I wanted a carrot. I was like no thanks, and he was like are you sure. I’m like yep I’m good, but thank you. Then he walked away. D says he was just looking for an excuse to talk to me. I mean…okay, but that’s a fucking strange approach, bro.

I’ve given up on trying to understand people.

I’ve been in a weird mood all day. Everything feels like a lot. This headache definitely hasn’t helped.

11:39 pm on a Friday night

I want to go into great detail about what a good day I’ve had, but I’m too fucking tired.

The short version: the workday flew by and then I spent the evening shopping and dining with my bestie. We had a great time.

And now I am in bed, where I will chill until I finally pass out.

Oh and maybe I’ll get crazy and smoke some weed in the bathroom (so I don’t bother our house guest).

What I’m not going to do is sit here and write a big long rant about how middle aged and frumpy I have felt all day, which is actually silly considering how many genuine compliments I received today, mostly from complete strangers, on my look/sense of style. But you know…this fucking brain of mine is a god damned asshole, so. 🤷🏻‍♀️

I didn’t take a picture of my outfit today, but it was a black and white cat dress over teal leggings with black Mary Jane heels. I also wore my black and white houndstooth jacket with a big pink flower brooch. I finished it off with a pearl headband. Two random people at court had a discussion right in front of me about my look, and informed me I look like some TV character I had never heard of.

And like yeah I guess I kind of do. ^^

hella good

Saturdays are my favorite day of the week. I’m pretty sure they are almost everyone’s favorite day of the week though, so that isn’t super surprising or anything.

I slept in today! I woke up at 8:30. I lounged about for a short while, but then got up and got to work. I’ve gotten in about two hours at this point. Not too shabby. There is more to do, but I may take a break. I really, really, really want to curl up with Ninth House. I read the prologue on Thursday, and I am intrigued!

There are a few book releases this month that I’m excited about. Ninth House, obviously. But also The Family Upstairs and The Giver of Stars.  I plan to read TFU after NH, and I selected TGOS as my Book Of The Month Club pick, so it is currently on its way to me. Yay!

But I also very much want to revisit this section of my bookcase:


I’m not sure what the plan is for the day. I know D wants to do some cleaning. At some point this weekend, I want to go shopping. I also want to run/walk/hike, read, sleep, bang, cook, and maybe watch some movies – just be sort of chill. We’ve also discussed heading down to the law office to move furniture around. I want to move my stuff into a different room. I need a fresh start.

What I don’t want to do: go out with friends/do anything social. I am too tired for that. This week was hard, and next week looks like it’s going to be even harder.

I kind of miss when people couldn’t reach me so easily. I miss not having a cell phone.

The Balsam Hill Christmas catalogue arrived, and omg I want everything!! I’m definitely buying some new ornaments this year for the big tree. I’ll try to restrain myself on everything else though, because the ever growing Christmas collection makes my husband crazy.

Confession: we listened to some Christmas music last night while making dinner. Yep…we are those people apparently. But it was classical, and not like carols, so I think we get a bit of a pass.

I don’t have much to discuss really. I’m a touch hungover. Booze is hitting me harder than it used to for some reason. I’m a bit stressed, but mostly happy. One of my attorney friends who knows about the split asked me yesterday, “So how are you???” I got a big smile on my face and replied, “I’m fucking awesome actually.” She smiled back and said, “Yeah you are!”

Peace & Love. Happy weekending.

Happy Anniversary List

  • I’ve been awake since around 4:30 am. I am done.
  • It’s 10:04 pm now.
  • It has been a fucking Monday.
  • Already dreaming of the weekend.
  • It’s Halloween party weekend!! ❤️
  • More people are finding out about The Situation. It has been interesting…the reactions.
  • We are watching The Tudors, and D and I have decided that, in our situation, I’m “the scandal of Christendom.”
  • His parents do refer to me as “the floozy” after all.
  • That makes me giggle.

The bullets stopped working because WordPress is fucking stupid. Eat me.

I took a break, and now I’m back. It’s 10:21 pm now.

I just took a big old hit. That’s the #1 perk of being self employed: no random drug testing.

I think of it as a Xanax + Ambien combo.

Oh!! Bismarck, aka the most beautiful boy ever, has been chosen to be one of the “12 Dogs of Christmas” at his daycare. I have to take him to a photo shoot on 11/10. My boy is a model!!

It’s 10:42 now (another break). I feel so relaxed right now. We’re currently discussing our wedding vows. Prior, we talked about which friends we want to fuck. That’s always a fun one.

Okay 10:52 here now. I need to go. Oh but I may post some pics.

Anniversary Pic 2019.


  • I watched three movies today: The Amityville Horror (2005), Insidious, and The Death of Stalin.
  • I also watched Chardee MacDennis: The Game of Games.
  • We made the famous mac and cheese tonight.
  • It didn’t have dog meat in it tho. (Sunny joke!)
  • Fuck tomorrow being Monday. Boo.
  • Freya called me a fashion expert the other day, and even though it isn’t true, it gave me all the good feels. 💛
  • Related to above: she wants me to help her start dressing/doing her make-up to look like an anime girl.
  • We finally ordered our Halloween costumes today. I’m excited about our theme for this year. BUT I CAN’T TELL YOU BECAUSE IT’S A SECRET.
  • Isn’t it sort of crazy that it will be 2020 soon? Time is such a mindfuck.
  • The moon looks incredibly cool tonight.
  • #conflicted
  • Tonight, D was like, “This is an opportunity for you to reinvent yourself,” and that definitely got my attention. I have to remember that change is good.
  • Remember to be grateful. I’m actually thinking of tattooing it on my wrist. Just the word: grateful.
  • Every day is a gift. Even the shitty ones.

about last night: the Alton adventure

Last night was kind of a shit show.

We drove to Alton, Illinois with a group of NIN obsessed friends to see the tribute band Somewhat Damaged. We had seen them before, and they put on a decent show, so we agreed. We also agreed to carpool. Big fucking mistake, bro.

The band was supposed to go on at nine. Then nine became ten. Eventually ten became eleven, but it was more like eleven-thirty before their set began. About halfway through the set, they experienced technical difficulties, which caused a twenty minute delay. We didn’t end up getting home until after two, and then had to deal with a hyper husky, so no sleep for us until after three. Then the husky woke me up at six-forty five. UGH.

Add to all of that the fact that I’m sick, and…yeah. Jenn was not a happy camper.

The venue was a total shithole; this place called Bottle and Barrel that was cash only. I mean, our first mistake was agreeing to go to Alton at all, because it, like all of Southern Illinois, sucks ass. The second mistake was agreeing to carpool. I will not be making that mistake again. I’ve been burned on that several times this year, and I’m over it. I want to leave when I want to leave. Towards the end of the set, D and I walked to the very front of the bar, like the farthest we could get from the stage, and played Uno. Lol. It was actually the highlight of the night. (Though I feel compelled to mention that we had dinner and drinks at Old Bakery Beer Company, which is the only halfway decent thing about Alton, and it was good despite having a very loud blues band performing, like so loud you couldn’t hear yourself think).

BUT…we unveiled the theme for our SAD party to our friends to test out their reactions, and they were so excited. So I guess I can officially share it here: D and I are going to be hosting an adult prom in January/February!! More on that later, but I’m pleased to say that we now have a five person prom planning committee. 🤣

Hosting parties is my jam, and I’m good at it. *pats self on back*

Oh back to last night: pics or it didn’t happen, right? I didn’t take many though.

You can see our friends up in the front, but our old asses hung back. I wasn’t giving up my chair. This is 40.

Not my pic below, but here is a pic of the girls. They decided to dress like The Crow. They asked me to join in. I declined. Like I told Dave: I’m 40 years old, and I cannot be walking around in public looking like a fucking reject clown.

I love them, but I just can’t. They look like Kiss rejects.

Also I’ve never seen The Crow, and have no desire to do so. Fight me.

The good news is that today is Sunday, and we have no plans other than to relax and eventually make chili.

Now I’m off to read.