The 5 love languages

I decided to join in on this particular Tumblr blog-a-day prompt.

I was not surprised by my results. The early part of my relationship with D taught me a lot about how I love and how I want to be loved in return. I am very much a verbal person. Of course I want you to show me, both physically and through actions, but you have to tell me too. That’s non-negotiable. I need to hear it.

If you want to take the test, you can find it here. I had D take it too.

TL;DR: touch me and tell me I’m pretty.

it’s awesome

though still feels kind of strange,
to be in a relationship where my partner cares so very much about my happiness.
you’d think i’d be used to it by now,
but there are times where i’m still like – wow.
for so many years, my happiness was secondary to…everything.
i got used to marginalizing myself.
now i don’t have to, but i sometimes forget.
it’s a hard habit to break.

he’s a keeper for sure.
he truly believes in the “happy wife, happy life” mantra,
and i try desperately not to take advantage of that fact.
i hope i’m succeeding.

he read my blog, decided i seemed sad, and texted to cheer me up. in the process, he solved a problem i was struggling with.

i love him forever.
i’m so glad he’s mine.
forever grateful.

i love you, babe.

cutesy

We do this cutesy thing where we send each other pics of what we’re listening to when the songs remind us of the other person. We started doing it a few years back, and it still makes me smile every single time.

This morning:

And it’s not lost on us how he’s the one listening to DMB and I’m listening to New Order. I guess maybe we’ve rubbed off on each other. Just a little…🥰

A time you don’t want to forget.

Not this particular memory necessarily, but what it signifies: the beginning of our relationship. ❤️

(We were actually just reminiscing last night about the day this pic was taken. We were very early on in our relationship, and he tagged along with me to Hannibal where I had a hearing. Afterwards, we visited the sites, and ultimately ended up on a river boat cruise, where we were by far the youngest people. Ha! We then hit up some bars, before eventually heading back to our hotel. It felt really good just to be together out in the world. We had a really good time, despite some drama that unfolded around 2 am. But, honestly, that drama just kind of brought us closer together in the end, so I have zero complaints.)

Even after all this time and even with all the changes to my body, if D sees me in a state of undress, he’ll pause and come check me out. He’s still so excited to see and touch my body, like he’s a kid in a candy shop, and it’s something I very much cherish.

How do you know when you’re in love?

I’ve only been in love twice, and it was different both times.

The first time was a gradual build up. I’m not even sure when or how I knew for sure, I just did. Our lives just became more and more entwined, until life just didn’t make sense without him in it.

This last time felt completely different. People talk about falling in love, and that’s what it felt like: falling. I remember that very early on, D sent me a song to describe how he was feeling, and it perfectly described my own feelings as well.

SHOVE – Angels & Airwaves

Forget the things that you own
And travel almost anywhere you can go
Dance across the tree tips, set them ablaze
Soaking in their pleasant warm summer haze
And weeping on her streets and school city blocks
And finding streams on her while you’re skipping rocks
And feeding on her touch as it will barely keep you alive

She said show me the world that’s inside your head,
Show me the world that you see yourself, you could use some help
Cause sometimes it comes with a shove, when you fall in love

It can be so bold and so cavalier
To reach out to the fire her souls sending here
It can be like death that blows like a breeze
Making all ones strength go weak at the knees
I hate to feel the shallow ground giving way
I’ve never let myself fall this much astray
And feeding on her touch is all one does to survive

She said show me the world that’s inside your head,
Show me the world that you see yourself, you could use some help
Cause sometimes it comes with a shove, when you fall in love

If you’re ever alone, then your heart will know
It can call to mine, and I’ll be at your side
If you’re ever alone, then your heart will know
It can reach to mine, I’ll be at your side

Memories

That’s the name of the playlist we’re listening to right now. This song is on it. It’s the first song I sent D as an “I love you” text back when I wasn’t supposed to love him, but I really, really did, and even more so now, over six years later.