truthful tuesday: the ‘jenn is a bitch’ edition

  • Sometimes someone will post about how boring they are, and I’ll be like…you’re right! Then I immediately unfollow them.
  • I mean…you said it.
  • I’m a lot of things, but I don’t think I’m boring.
  • I’m definitely bitchy though, so if you don’t like bitchy people then *you* should unfollow me.
  • I’ve also unfollowed people recently for having to be a hater about fucking everything. I don’t have time for that shit. Let people be excited about shit, for fuck’s sake.
  • I’ve unfriended people whose politics I generally agree with for being condescending assholes about it.
  • I’m tired of pretending to like people I don’t actually like. I don’t think I’m going to do it anymore. There is one exception to this.
  • Okay…there are three exceptions, actually.
  • For now.
  • I used to have my mom restricted on Facebook, but I don’t anymore. My mom is actually pretty fucking cool, so I’m just going to go with it. She doesn’t mind all of my f-bombs. I mean, she’s the one I learned it from, so…
  • I saw a meme the other day that said something like: everyone loves a bad ass bitch until they realize that the bad ass bitch isn’t going to take their shit either. I find this to be shockingly accurate, and kind of the story of my life right now.
  • I saw another meme that was like: I don’t burn bridges, I just let them slowly deteriorate over time. That’s so me, unless you fuck with me, and then I will burn this motherfucker down, to even my own detriment, just to spite you.
  • I get ragey, you see. Red Jenn. I’ve gotten way better about it over the years, but at the end of the day, I have quite the temper.
  • Just ask my ex husband.
  • Or fuck…ask my soon-to-be. Though honestly, we don’t fight much. When we do, it can get cray. But I just love the way we make up.
  • Heart eyes, motherfuckers. I know we’re gross, but I just don’t care.
  • People love to hate other people for being happy. I read a blog post about me once that was basically like “enjoy it while it lasts” and I was like mmm hmm.
  • I just got the kind of text I love to see from Dave: “I’m on my way.”
  • Date night in the city, bitches.

xoxo

Truths from the heart

❤️I’m in a group text with D and his ex regarding their daughter who is often in my care…so it makes sense and I’m pleased to be in the loop. BUT…there’s something still slightly triggering whenever I see their names next to each other like that: David & Karen – that’s what it says when I open the text thread and with their pics right next to one another. Like a couple. 5 1/2 years in, with a wedding 3 months away, and little things like that can still occasionally spark an emotional reaction. Aren’t emotions the worst sometimes? 

❤️I’m certain this reaction stems from the first year of our relationship where I was convinced he would go back to her, despite his reassurances that it would never happen. Whenever we split up (and there were a few break ups before we got it right) that’s where my head would always go. “Oh he’ll take the easy road of mediocrity instead of the rocky road that leads to great happiness.” I’m so thankful I was wrong. 

❤️I think of that situation whenever I hear the song Back to Black by Amy Winehouse, which always reduces me to tears. Sucks too because it’s a favorite of mine. I got drunk and sang it when it came on at last year’s Halloween party; then cried on my bestie’s shoulder. Lol

❤️Another somewhat related and similarly petty truth? Once a couple of years back, a friend of Dave’s commented on a pic of his, “Didn’t ex-wife teach you how to take a proper selfie?” This was well after their divorce and it really pissed me off. I held the grudge all the way up to a few months ago when we met her and her husband for dinner.

❤️And finally, a related but not at all petty, truth. I feel this one in my bones. I’ll always and forever be jealous that I won’t have a child with Dave but she did. I love our lifestyle and I know that a baby would change everything.  Rationally, I don’t want that. But…

thanks for reading 

I think you’ve mistaken me for

someone interesting. It boggles my mind that so many people read this blog, but I’m pretty sure the stats don’t lie, so… Hi! You should say hi sometime. You know you want to! 

And because it’s Truthful Tuesday:

  • Sex with virtual strangers is fun. 
  • I’m def bisexual. 
  • The dude from the other night had a porn dick and there is such a thing as too big. 
  • But…he’s on the shortlist of dudes who have made me cum. 
  • It’s funny how you can revisit something with a new partner and everything is different. And by different I mean better. D makes everything better. 😍 *heart eyes for days*
  • It has been a little over five years since the great marriage break-ups of 2012, and, for the first time, I can honestly say I don’t feel guilty anymore. I’m over it, and I hope they are too. 
  • I do recognize, however, that it’s easier for me to be over it since D and I are the big winners here. 
  • Which sounds smug as fuck, I know, but…
  • Some people think I share too much of myself here, but they’ve mistaken me for someone who gives a fuck about what most people think. 
  • See what I did there. Full circle, bitches. 

petty 

There’s a colleague of mine who is constantly posting on Facebook about what a bad ass bitch she is just out in the world getting shit done. But in reality, this chick is constantly asking me and others to cover her cases and I so want to reply to one of her updates and be passive aggressive about it, but I won’t. I guess.